Friday, February 24, 2012
Nostalgia of buried lust.
Posted at 8:41 PM
The title says it all. The emotional state that I am in. Nostalgia of buried lust. The last post was on a November. And from that, I have confessed my intentions on trying to win back my beautiful ex boyfriend, Syamil. But the tides have changed, the wind has spoken and my heart has fallen.
Sure, I have so much love for the guy. So so so much love. It's mind blowing. I miss him. I miss just talking to him. But things have been so complicated that I have decided to bury all of these feelings deep within me as I wander in nostalgia. I reminisce and I hope for the best. Sometimes I hurt myself, but it's okay.
He is happy now. He's found 'the love of his life'. Funny how people change the love of their lives like they change their favourite food. I don't like her. And I made it very clear to everyone. And I am not ashamed of saying it. I'm sorry Fika, but I just don't like you. I can't force myself to like you. And if you ever call me a jealous bitch again, I think I might just throw a hissy fit. I am not jealous of you. I've had him first. I've had him far longer than you. Please get this straight, I am not out to get you. I have no intention on ruining someone's happiness. Make him happy, take good care of him. If you don't then someone else might just take him away from you. Him and I are mutual friends with a mutual understanding. Although we are no longer together, I still hope for the best for him, as do he.
I know these are old stories. I'm just writing this to update. I'm experiencing major writer's block right now. Ugh.
Mr. Darcy: You have bewitched me, body and soul, and I love, I love, I love you. I never wish to be parted from you from this day on.
