❀❀❀❀❀

Monday, July 9, 2012

123 Posted at 10:37 PM

123 days till SPM. This is crazy. I have now reallocated myself to Kakak's room just because it's smaller and more peaceful. I will be sleeping here till I finish my exams and then eventually move out. This will be the last (hopefully) post that I will share with the internet world, right after I click Publish, I will start making deals with my brain. I hope it doesn't fail me tonight.

I'm having a lot of fun, doing nothing, just laughing with my friends. They are amazing. The thing is, I never feel like I'm not enough with them. It's like everything is taken into consideration and I feel needed. I feel good.

Faroq missed his flight. *facepalm* Just when we thought he was already home, enjoying Kuala Lumpur's heat to soothe his jetlag, we found out that he woke up late at missed his flight. When I told mother, her reaction was just a shocking 'What?!' It was funny. If I were to have missed my flight, I would get a never ending nag from my mother, and she'd probably break down and cry at the airport, causing a scene. Since we're low on cash, there's no way that we could buy another ticket for the next day. We'd probably have to stay here for a few weeks and get a job or smth. Ha. But no complains, what is better than being in a foreign country without responsibilities and stuff? Of course, I'd have to worry about my SPM but I think it'd be amazing being trapped in a country you love.

I'm thinking of taking A-Levels. But I'm still contemplating. It's just mind boggling cause I don't know what I want to be. And everytime someone asks me what's my biggest traits and what do I like to do the most, I get annoyed and I might even ignore the question and walk away. The thing is, I just don't know. I feel like it'd be such a waste if I got straight A's and I took A-Levels and when I get out, I have absolutely no idea what I want to be. Sigh. I promise myself that when I have kids, I will constantly expose them to various kinds of environment. And maybe throughout that journey, they'll find themselves and discover what they want to do for the rest of their lives.

Is it okay if I just want to graduate and then just be a housewife? I'd really like to take care of my kids. Do nothing, knit stuff, clean the house, please my husband. Hahaha. If anyone reads this, they'll be weirded out, especially my future boyfriend. Wherever you are. Okay, SPM first. Marriage later. Got it.

I miss him. Even though we're barely anything, I miss him. I don't care if he's in love with someone else or if he's a commitment-phobe. I just want to have the privilege to miss him. Because missing him is beautiful. He is.

Goodnight everyone. When you feel lazy, think 123.